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Thursday, April 17, 2008

People are weird

So I was sitting on a bench on campus, minding my own business, feeding some birds and eating a hotdog...(yum), when these 2 annoying blond girls started walking my way. They were laughing and being obnoxious before they even got near me. Right when they were next to me, one of them jumped at me and grabbed for my hotdog. Being a ninja and smarter than any blond girl I know (joke, but I'm annoyed), I quickly closed the foil around the hot dog and gave her a look like, what in the world??!! They just laughed and kept walking. One of them looked back and I was still giving them a strange glare. The one who had tried to take it goes, "can't I have a bite"? Really sarcastic. I said, "no, I don't know what diseases you might have....and I don't want the clap" Ha Ha Ha. She gave me this, "I can't believe you just said that!" look, to which i gave her the, "oh you better believe I just did" look back. It was soooo strange. People are bizarre. Moral of the story: don't mess with me when I'm eating.

Sunday, April 13, 2008

Bird Field Trip

So this story has to do with my trip down to the St. George area for our ornithology field trip. On the way back to provo we stopped at a fast food place for lunch. I went across the street to the gas station to get some candy and decided to use the restroom before we took off again. So right as i was about to go into the bathroom this guy came out and I caught a little bit of him telling the attendant, "there's something wrong with the toilet". As I walked into the bathroom I saw a disgusting scene. The bathroom was gross and the toilet was clogged with tons of paper and....other stuff. (use your imagination....really). Just then, the old, nasty gas station attendant came into the bathroom with me. He said, "looks like there's a problem here". At this point I'm thinking, do I stay, do I go? So I just stay. There I am, standing in the bathroom with this old guy as he's plunging away. The disgusting toilet water was sloshing all over the place. He tried to flush the toilet but nothing went down, so he started plunging again. By this point I was looking into the mirror just thinking...how did I get myself into this? Why am i still in this bathroom alone with this guy as he's plunging this toilet? Then I thought, should I sneak out? I decided that would be the best option, so I quietly snuck out as he continued to mess with the vile toilet. Then I just ran away back across the street. Awkward!!!! The end.

Friday, April 4, 2008

Clarification

Okay, it's only been a few minutes and he's already denying it! He says that the internet is serious business and "you can't just post whatever you want". Ha Ha Ha...This is like that Seinfeld episode where everything Jerry says, Sally puts it in her act. Anyways, Let me clarify...this stalking that I did on bj took place over months and months. It wasn't just a little game either. There were times when I would run across campus trying to get around to a different place so he wouldn't see me. Twice I went the back way, all the way around the brick oven so I could sneak up on him. And I failed time and time again. I tried everything but he's a wily minx, very hard to catch....BUT then, one day, I ran across the grass by the testing center (notice how detailed this is...that means it's true) I ran on the grass so he wouldn't hear, then while he was walking down the ramp, I got him. So yes, I did succeed. That's straight truth son! Everyone should agree with me.

Ninja Skills

I just want everyone to know that I am ready for hire as a professional ninja....or stalker, whatever you want to call it. I'm always sneaking up on Jess around campus and It's actually a fun game for me. I started training a year or two ago when I would stalk bj in the afternoons. We used to get out of class at the exact same time, so we would be heading home around the same time too. Everyday I would hide in different buildings or sneak around different paths, just trying to sneak up behind him. I failed many many times except for this one time (which he will still deny) where I had to start running on the grass so he wouldn't hear me. That's when I finally became a true stalker. I'm actually really good at it. So there you have it. The end

Favorite thing right now: Kathy Griffins Allegedly DVD <----my favorite comic